The three magic words that make or break someone, “i love you”, and magic words they really are. Ever noticed how when, say a girl, is told those words everything changes? The changes vary from simple things like her smile to the complex things like her confidence walk. Yes, everything changes! The way she dresses being the most drastic and noticeable change that takes place. She will start wearing ass fitting clothes, dresses that shows off her bosom, heels that leave your mind blank and such. Its almost the same for guys, for example, some guys become neater, some become brighter in terms of clothes. some gain a new spring in their steps and some become more confidence in their dealings (very noticeable).
But this post is not to discuss the words ‘i love you’ and their effect on the human population, no, its to discuss the answer. Or rather the response.
Let me ask, am i the only one who feels the pressure immediately those words are uttered? Or maybe its not the words that pressurize, but the ‘look’ that comes after the words? Am not sure but whichever it is, it makes me dread hearing those words. Its not that am anti-love or anything of the sort, i just don’t like the 5 minutes that follow. Because somehow, they are always awkward! And in that moment, my mind ‘magically’ transforms to Google and googles ‘ the right response for i love you’ but unlike Google, i get 0 results. I don’t even get ‘related pages’. Just a blank page.
Afterwards when thinking of how that situation could have been salvaged, i always wonder what is the right response for that? ‘i love you too’? ‘thank you’? ‘awwww…that’s so sweet of you’? what is the right response? Cos for me, the first thing that springs to mind is “oh shit”…followed closely by ” Lord, GIVE ME WORDS”…..which leads to a smile and then an over cheery voice (hard to believe that its mine) says “awwwww….me too” and a quick hug. For all those whom i have given this response to, what i meant was ”i love me too”. That’s not to say i don’t love other people in that manner, i do, just not to the level that requires me to say “i love you too”.
In my defense, ‘i love you’ is not a question! Its a statement that someone says, not a question. So yes, it actually bothers me when someone utters the words and then looks at me expectantly as if am to answer. All i can do is comment, now whether my comment is misunderstood, or not satisfactory is not my fault. Nevertheless, in the past, i have found myself in a situation where i feel i have to apologize for not giving the expected response. And am quite sure am not alone. But why should we apologize? Why should i say am sorry for not feeling the same way? Its not my fault that you misread my vibes and action? In fact, instead of me apologizing, it should be the other way round. You said the words and put me in a weird situation, you should apologize to me! And on top of that, whatever relationship there was between, whether budding friendships or college buddies, workmates or roommates, it all goes down the drain. So if there is need for anyone to apologize, it should be you for ruining that for me.
Some might argue that ‘i love you too’ is THE appropriate answer for it. Appropriate, probably, but it MIGHT not. Where is it written? Just because we found people exchanging it doesn’t mean its the one. Maybe it was a misunderstanding that got out of control and no one realized it. I know in your mind you are laughing but think about it. What if someone happened to be passing when two love birds were in the ‘i love you’-ing stage and he heard the the words exchanged, then he thought it was a way of life and passed it along? just what if? I know its accepted universally but it always rings wrong in my ears when i say it. It could be that maybe one day it will ring right, or it could be that its just not meant to roll out of my tongue. Or still maybe, am just commitment-phobic!
Saying i love you too is very much connecting dots that join up with i love you to make a circle(am circle-phobic too) and not saying the words kinda leaves the circle incomplete, and open. And hence, terms and condition that come with that phrase don’t apply. But this is just my weed infested opinion, share your thoughts…..